


You're Gonna Live Forever in Me

by mar106



Category: League of Legends
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Bittersweet Ending, Childhood Friends, F/F, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Childhood Trauma, Implied/Referenced Jinx/Lux, Long Live Feedback Comment Project, Past Jinx/Vi, Songfic, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-25
Updated: 2020-04-25
Packaged: 2021-03-02 03:28:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,698
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23844481
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mar106/pseuds/mar106
Summary: Jinx's life has been... well, rough doesn't quite cut it. And most of the time, the easiest thing for her to do is just to bury it all - including her humanity.(Seeing Vi makes her remember the times before she was so twisted up inside.)Also, in case you missed it: SUICIDE ATTEMPT IN SECOND CHAPTER. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!
Relationships: Caitlyn/Vi (League of Legends), Jinx & Vi
Comments: 5
Kudos: 19





	1. Prologue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The quote at the beginning is from Swain, after he gains a soul fragment from Jinx. Unfortunately, I cannot embed it directly (wrong file type) so [here is the direct link](https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/leagueoflegends/images/1/17/Swain_147.ogg/revision/latest?cb=20180124090835).

> _“Faces, fading in the flames. It was all her fault."_

Vi had seen a side of Jinx that few people got to see. The Jinx who sat completely still, staring off into space. The Jinx who cried for all the people she’d killed. The Jinx who made anonymous donation to Zaunite orphanages and fire brigades. The Jinx whose frontal cortex was the dominating force, whose morals and ethics were the envy of Vi herself.

It was like seeing Dr. Jekyll for the first time, after only knowing Mr. Hyde. It was fitting, then that she learned Jinx’s real name during one of these times.

“You know, Jinx isn’t my real name,” she had said, suddenly looking at Vi. Vi had not known what to say, really. Of course she hadn’t known, how could she? “Jane. My name is Jane.” Then she had gone back to staring at the ceiling. 

Vi got up from where she had been sitting and plopped down next to the blue-haired woman. Placing her hand on the other’s shoulder, she said, “Ji-Jane?” Jane smiled a bit, shifting her gaze from the ceiling to Vi. “Well, I, ah, I thought I should say something, and I’m not very good at this, but… Thanks. For telling me that. Your name. I’m sure- well, it shows that you trust me. And, uh. Yea. That’s it.”

Jane grinned wider, leaning against Vi and wrapping her arms around the pinkette. “I love you too, Violet.” Jane glanced up to see what effect her words had had with a slightly impish look on her face.

Vi’s head was spinning. Her face was alternately going completely pale and bright scarlet. She felt as if she was in free fall. No one had called her that since she had still lived in that orphanage, since before she had dyed her hair, when it still reached down past her ears… How did ~~Jinx~~ Jane know??

Pushing herself off the toned woman, Jane got up, leaving Violet to process. She had to deal with her hair. As Jane shook it out of its braids, and it cascaded down her back like a river, a memory struck Vi square in the face.

A short, slender girl with long hair that she let hang in waves down her back. Her red hair contrasted beautifully against her pale skin. She had been kind, so kind to the kids next door in the orphanage. She never looked down on them for not having parents, and Violet had loved her. Then, her house had burned down, and Violet had never seen her again. She had said…

_She had said her name was Jane._

“You… You’re… The girl next door…” Vi’s voice shook. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is very purposefully third-person and far narration. Even just scratching the surface of this version of Jinx is fucking hard, and it's only going to get worse next chapter. BE WARNED.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vi had never thought she would see her again. Alas, that was not to be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The songfic starts here! Song is _You're Gonna Live Forever in Me_ by John Mayer.   
> [Spotify Link](https://youtu.be/nMd5-SB8h8E?t=75>Youtube%20Link</a>%20\(unfortunately%20live\)%0A<a%20href=)
> 
> BIG FLASHING WARNING:  
>  **SUICIDE ATTEMPT**  
>  THIS IS THE LAST WARNING. PROCEED AT YOUR OWN RISK.

Jinx couldn’t take it anymore. She had strapped all the rockets and ammo and bombs she could find to her chest and rigged it all to blow. And seeing Vi standing in front of her, in that blue and black uniform? Well, that just made her want to really jam her thumb down on that button.

“YOU TRAITOR,” Jinx screamed. “GO AWAY!”

“Look,” Vi responded, trying to keep calm, remembering what Caitlyn had taught her. “I don’t wanna hurt you, but-”

“YOU DON’T WANT TO HURT ME? BIT LATE FOR THAT, VI! I TRUSTED YOU!” Jinx’s voice broke and she began to sob. “I trusted you, and you left me! How could you Vi? Actually I don’t care!” Her rage seemed to take the fore again, though her eyes did not stop leaking. “I DON’T FUCKING CARE ABOUT ANYTHING ANYMORE. MY LIFE IS MEANINGLESS AND EMPTY I JUST WANT TO STOP HURTING. SO I'M GONNA KILL MYSELF AND EVERYBODY IN THIS FUCKING BUILDING, AND IT'S ALL GONNA BE BECAUSE OF YOU, YOU BITCH!”

Suddenly, Vi was leaping through the air directly at her.

_Great big bang, and dinosaurs; fiery rain, and meteors; it all ends unfortunately. But you’re gonna live forever in me, I guarantee, just wait and see._

The next thing Jinx knew, she was flat on her back, with Vi’s arms around her, and they were both crying. Vi’s eyes were shut tight, and she was… saying something?

“Jane, please. I know you’re in there. Please, don’t do it. Please Jane, don’t do it.” Vi continued, on and on, a litany, a prayer. Suddenly, she felt the small body in her arms stiffen, and go still. Then the bluenette's hands began to shake as she released her grip on the detonator.

* * *

On the other side of a sniper scope, Caitlyn’s heart froze at the look on Jinx’s face. She would recognize that 1000-yard stare anywhere. She had seen it on the faces of beat officers, of detectives, of special ops members. She had seen it in the mirror a couple of times.

Catlyn's bile rose in her throat as she suddenly saw who public enemy number one really was. She was a child. A child that had seen much, much more than any child her age had any right to have seen. She clicked the safety on her rifle back into its proper place, horrified that she had even _thought_ of pulling that trigger.

Folding the bipod and slinging her rifle over her back, Caitlyn started down the steps, shaking her head.

* * *

_Parts of me were made by you, and planets keep their distance too. The moon’s got a grip on the sea. You’re gonna live forever in me, I guarantee, it’s your destiny._

A man in full EOD kit walks up to them and gives Vi a nudge with the edge of his boot. The look he gives her is half-admonishing, half-grateful. Vi tugs on Jinx's jacket a bit, and she lifts her arms, allowing it to slip up and over her head. Vi hands the thing to the other demolitions expert in the room (and the only other one who actually knew about explosives), and he waddled away further into the building, likely looking for a table on which he could work with the thing.

Jane had gone from quivering, to shaking, to sobbing, and all Vi could do to carry her out of the building, whispering reassurances. Thankfully, Vi was able to stop the litany of apologies before they got outside. However, when they did, they were plunged into a sea of flashing lights and noise which made Jane cling to Vi even harder. Wading through it, Vi's eyes met Caitlyn's, and a look of understanding passed between them. Caitlyn quickly ferried them to her exclusive Sherrif's Cruiser, and the aura of calm it projected. (It helped that it was off to the side of the practical pile of emergency vehicles at the front of the building.)

Vi made to set Jane down, but she clung fast. Vi said gently, "I need to put my gauntlets away. They won't fit in the car. I won't be long, I promise." Jane glanced at Caitlyn, standing slightly off to the side. Replying to her unspoken question, Vi said, "She's fine. She won't hurt you. She's my partner, and I trust her with my life - you know I don't say that lightly." Jane nodded, and stepped down. Caitlyn had since moved to the front of the car and sat down on its hood, gesturing for Jane to join her. She did, and sat down gingerly, saying nothing. She could barely look at the black-haired woman, and the silence that stretched between them was awkward. Jane began to fiddle with her hair when she realized it was still in braided twin-tails.

"Do you want help with that?" Jane found Caitlyn's voice to be, well... Posh. However, unlike the other posh voices she had heard throughout her life, this one wasn't cold, or sneering, or mocking. This one was surprisingly warm. She nodded. "I remember when I had hair this long." Caitlyn's fingers were surprisingly gentle, unraveling the braids with nary a tug. "I used to love it when my father would braid it, all in one big rope, because it was the only time I could get his full attention for an extended period of time." Jane shivered slightly as Caitlyn's hand accidentally brushed the back of her neck. It had been so long since she had been close to another person. "...but then he got busier, and didn't have the time to braid my hair anymore. So I cut it off." Shaking out her hair, Jane felt a bit bad for reminding her of what was probably not a pleasant memory. 

"I wouldn't mind it if you braided my hair like that," Jane whispered. "I-if you want to, that is!"

"I would like that very much."

* * *

Sitting in the back of the police cruiser, Jane had a good view of the women in front. When Caitlyn put her hand on the center console, and Vi laced her own fingers into hers, Jane was suddenly struck in the face with the reality of their relationship. That was what Vi had meant when she called Caitlyn her "partner." 

Jane felt her heart give a little twist, and pushed the feeling down. Her and Vi's relationship was long over. And besides, Vi was clearly happy.

_Life if full of sweet mistakes, and love’s an honest one to make. Time leaves no fruit on the tree. But you’re gonna live forever in me, I guarantee, it’s just left to me._

Vi looked dashing in a suit, but the effect was marred slightly by the ear-to-ear grin she wore. That, and the giant, steaming, whirring, building-destroying gauntlets she wore. To be fair, though, Jane had not expected anything else. Their little wedding was beautiful, and Jinx's heart was full-to-bursting with happiness for her friends. It did make her heart hurt, a bit, but in a good way. They were perfect for each other, after all. 

_And when the pastor asks the pews, for reasons he can't marry you, I’ll keep my word in my seat. But you’re gonna live forever in me. I guarantee, just wait and see._

Besides, it was easier to move on when you had someone else to look at. And a certain head of bright blonde hair with a sunny smile had certainly caught her eye.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cut Scenes:
> 
>   * A bit more ViJinx gayness involving teasing about childhood crushes
>   * Caitlyn telling the story of her first case to Jane while she braids her hair
>   * Vi, after packing away her gauntlets in the back of the cruiser with Cait's rifle, being struck by the weirdness of the image that was presented to her: current girlfriend braiding her first girlfriend's hair.
> 


**Author's Note:**

> This story is part of the [LLF Comment Project](https://longlivefeedback.tumblr.com/llfcommentproject), which was created to improve communication between readers and authors. This author invites and appreciates feedback, including (but not limited to):
> 
> Feedback
> 
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> 
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